Ian Try’s Online Dating. Hilarity Ensues.

I just received some email out of nowhere from a supposed Craigslist message. Containing no specific information, but referencing past email interaction with a chick named Kate S, who writes me from babygurl518@gmail.com. Kate sent me the following message (copied exactly, spelling errors included):

You Still There? (Kay from craigs ilst) Craigs Ilst? WTF! Is that like some alternative Craigslist? What have I been missing out on?

Hey what’s up, it’s Kay… You responded to my ad on Craigslist, & I
emailed you back, remember. No, no I don’t remember. I linked you to my profile on Snet, but
after a while, I started wondering why I wasn’t getting messages from
anyone new, I contacted their customer support, only to find out that I
had to have a paying membership for my profile to show up in their
search function. (I know, retarded! lol) Ya, totally retarded! I’m loling right now! So anyway, needless to say I
deleted my account, & found a site that doesn’t do that type of bs.
I understand this is alot of hoops to jump through to chat with me (It totally is, but somehow I think you just might be worth it!), but
if you’re still interested in getting to know me better, check me out &
send me a message at:
If not i understand..(Thats what I love about you, Kay. You are so understanding when dealing with online rejection)
Again I’m sorry about the singlesnet crap, & I’m just as pissed as you
are, trust me. 🙁
ttyl …(I hope lol)
– Kay

To which I crafted, and promptly sent, the following response:

Kay, if that is your name,

why can’t we just communicate via email, or, better yet, in person? Or why would I have to join a singles dating website in order to contact you, since you were able to send me an email from your gmail account just fine? Lets say, for the sake of argument, that you are not a spammer sending me a link to some scam dating site. That you are a real person who sincerely wants to talk to me, and get to know me. Isn’t the point of joining a dating site so you can actually meet the person and get their actual contact information? Well you obviously have my email address, which is a much more direct way to reach me than through a third party website.
“I understand this is alot of hoops to jump through to chat with me” – Hell, we both have gmail, right? Why can’t we just chat through gmail? Oh, thats right, I need to sign up for your god damn website to be able to learn more about you. Kay, I fear our relationship is already off to a troubled start. We can’t even decide on a good way to talk.
Question: Why the fuck would you think I would join this”perfspot.com” to contact you, instead of just replying to your email? Not mention, that if you actually ARE a scammer, and I were stupid enough to click on the link you have provided me, I’m pretty sure www – perfspot.com would not take me to any sort of website, rather a 404 error page. I mean, seriously, the basis of any good email based scam is providing me with a seemingly legitimate URL to click on before you steal my information.
God damn it Kay, you are obviously so new to this. I feel so sorry for you, I would like to help get you started in your new online dating scam career. I won’t put up any fight on this one, hell, I’ll just give you my social security and credit card numbers straight up. I mean, fuck you must be going hungry if you can’t get the fucking link right on your scam email. I am sincerely worried for your well being and livelihood in the online dating scam industry.
In other words, Kay…FUCK OFF.
oh, on the chance this actually is a hot blonde interested in meeting – disregard the above message and write me back 🙂

I am eagerly awaiting a response.

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