The Montana Cowboy

A Montana cowboy was overseeing his herd in a remote mountainous pasture  
when suddenly a brand new BMW advanced out of a dust cloud towards him. 
The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, Ray Ban Sunglasses  
and YSL tie, leans out the window and asks the cowboy, "If I tell you exactly

how many cows and calves you have in your herd, will you give me a calf?" 
The cowboy looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his  
peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, "Sure, why not?" 
Cowboy-and-Sunset-Print-C10054615The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer, connects  
it to his Cingular RAZR V3 cell phone, and surfs to a NASA Page on the  
Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite navigation System to get an  
exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite  
that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo. 
The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and exports  
it to an image processing facility in Hamburg, Germany. 
Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot that the image; has 
been processed and the data stored. 
He then accesses a MS-SQL database through an ODBC connected Excel  
spreadsheet with email on his Blackberry and, after a few minutes,  
receives a response. 
Finally, he prints out a full-color, 15 page report on his hi-tech,  
miniaturized HP LaserJet printer and finally turns to the cowboy and says, 
"You have exactly 1,586 cows and calves." 
"That’s right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves," says the  
He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on amused as  
the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car. 
Then the cowboy says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly  
what your business is, will you give me back my calf?" 
The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay, why not?" 
You’re a Congressman for the US Government", says the cowboy. 
"Wow! That’s correct," says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?" 
"No guessing was required", answered the cowboy. "You showed up here even  
though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already  
knew, to a question I never asked. You tried to show me how much smarter  
than me you are; and you don’t know a thing about cows…this is a herd of 

Now give me back my dog.

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