The HALO3 Guilt Trip

halo3703As you all know, HALO3 came out today.  And, as you all know, I did not pre order, however, Casey did.  As usual, Casey rubbed this fact in my face, letting me know that his plans for the night were to suit up as Master Chief and have his way with the covenant  until the sun came up.  I have to admit, that caused a bit of jealousy on my part. This extremely awkward situation caused the following conversation to ensue:

[15:25] The Gun Show: hey…ask me what im going to do tonight
[15:25] BetterOffAloneSB: ok.
[15:25] BetterOffAloneSB: what are you doing tonight
[15:27] The Gun Show: oh…hey Ian…funny you should have totally asked me that randomly.  I’ll be sitting in front of my 50 inch television putting myself of the shoes of the master chief and playing halo 3 till the sun comes up
[15:28] BetterOffAloneSB: you
[15:28] BetterOffAloneSB: bastard
[15:28] BetterOffAloneSB: im still looking around for a copy of skate
[15:28] BetterOffAloneSB: and here you are playing HALO3
[15:28] The Gun Show: oh…you mean you didn’t pre order your own copy of HALO3?
[15:28] The Gun Show: that just seems some what irresponsible
[15:28] BetterOffAloneSB: no 🙁
[15:29] The Gun Show: wow…that’s gonna really taper your fun levels for the weak
[15:30] The Gun Show: er… *week
[15:30] BetterOffAloneSB: is it sold out?
[15:30] BetterOffAloneSB: do you already have it?
[15:30] The Gun Show: sorry…i was just thinking about how "weak" it is you can’t play halo3.
[15:30] BetterOffAloneSB: dude
[15:30] BetterOffAloneSB: srsly
[15:30] The Gun Show: yeah…we had an inside man pick it up last night
[15:30] BetterOffAloneSB: as my friend
[15:30] BetterOffAloneSB: you should not play it without me
[15:30] BetterOffAloneSB: here is why
[15:30] BetterOffAloneSB: remember when i got HALO
[15:31] BetterOffAloneSB: and you came over and played it
[15:31] BetterOffAloneSB: and we were double gunning on that
[15:31] BetterOffAloneSB: ‘thog
[15:31] BetterOffAloneSB: .
[15:31] BetterOffAloneSB: that is why
[15:32] The Gun Show: you…son of a bitch…
[15:32] The Gun Show: you’re going to bring the ‘thog into this?
[15:32] The Gun Show: i have the chance to play halo3 till i pass out tonight…and you are seriously going to put that kind of guilt on me?
[15:32] BetterOffAloneSB: im sorry dude
[15:32] BetterOffAloneSB: just think it through
[15:32] BetterOffAloneSB: i have no doubt you will make the right decision
[15:33] BetterOffAloneSB: just remember who suited up as master chief right next to you, followed you through battling the flood
[15:34] BetterOffAloneSB: who helped you solve the mystery of the flood with Cortana
[15:34] BetterOffAloneSB: who went the distance with you side by side against the covenant
[15:35] BetterOffAloneSB: who was with you when us and cortana rescued Captain Keyes, Captain of the Pillar of Autumn
[15:36] BetterOffAloneSB: Who was recruited by 343 Guilty Spark to retrieve the index that Activated HALO and stopped the flood from spreading
[15:36] BetterOffAloneSB: who high fived you and screamed "DOBLE!" at the top of his lungs when misting some poor bastards head with a sweet sniper shot
[15:36] BetterOffAloneSB: I dont know you any more
[15:36] BetterOffAloneSB: you are a ghost
[15:37] BetterOffAloneSB: good. i hope you are speechless
[15:37] BetterOffAloneSB: turncoat
[15:46] The Gun Show: so now with each well placed round i put into the brains of the flood, with each well laid plan to out flank the covanent, with every squeez of the trigger…all im going to feel is the weight of guilt now…
[15:48] BetterOffAloneSB: i should hope so
[15:49] The Gun Show: But why would you want me to be unhappy?  As my friend you should respect my want…no my duty…my calling…my destiny to carry on the fight.  to protect our planet from those who wish to use the halo for wrong…  You should be encouraging me with words like "get out there case…"  " GIVE EM HELL!"
[15:50] The Gun Show: and showering me with praise…saying "thank you…you dont know how much it means to both me and my family that you would put your life on the line for our saftey…i wish to one day be as courageous as you"
[15:52] BetterOffAloneSB: yeah.  if i was an understanding, considerate team player, i could see myself saying that.  Painting your codename: "DEUCE" on the side of your master chief helmet with a pair of aces beneath…perhaps raising the roof as you scored a headshot on some poor covenant bastard.  Unfortunately.  I can’t do that.  I am pissed that I did not pre order.  I am bitter, jealous, angry, and will guilt trip you so bad you can not enjoy one second of HALO3 without me.
[15:53] BetterOffAloneSB: WAIT!  I retract all previous statements!  Just got off the phone with my buddy at circuit city – they still have some in stock and are holding for me!  WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
[15:53] BetterOffAloneSB: FUCKIN’ A bud – get out there!
[15:55] The Gun Show: LETS DOOOOOOOO THIS!
[15:55] BetterOffAloneSB: i got your back
[15:55] BetterOffAloneSB: you know that
[15:55] BetterOffAloneSB: i didn’t mean any of that shit. srsly
[15:56] The Gun Show: Ian…i just want you to with you luck…and i know you have the Give ‘Em Hell attitude it takes to show those alien bastards the spirit we have
[15:56] The Gun Show: ill be back..i gotta run down the street to the post office.
[15:57] BetterOffAloneSB: HOOOAAA
[15:57] The Gun Show: there is rumour that the flood is attacking the stamp machine…and i need to take charge down there.  SBPD has their heads up their asses. 
[15:57] The Gun Show: i also need to get some stamps
[15:57] BetterOffAloneSB: mother of god.

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